Posted Jul 8, 2008 8:21am
Hi everyone – Hope you had a safe and relaxing 4th. We were enjoying the family in Tahoe, with beautiful weather and lots of laughing. I came home to a box full of emails, and I want to thank you again for all the support and good wishes. There are several spoken and unspoken questions, so welcome to: Frequently Asked Questions, a three part series (unless I think of something else).
FAQ - Part I
Let’s start off with one of the spoken questions; I think it’s valid…
Q. Why is it that we’re all so worried about you and you always sound like you’re getting ready to go to Disneyland????????????
A. I wondered about that myself, and if it were perhaps a manic episode. One of my patients, a beautiful, vibrant woman who is a breast cancer survivor, clarified the feelings for me the other day. Her eyes moistened as she expressed that if she had the choice of never having had cancer or having it, she would accept it all over again, because it enriched her life so much. That even if you have a good prognosis, you walk outside and suddenly take a greater delight in seeing your garden. You look up and appreciate the sky and love the people around you even more. And you know you darn well better, because there is a deeper awareness that we never know how long we have to enjoy it.
There’s something about hearing “It’s breast cancer” (or any similar news or diagnosis) that transforms your life in an explosive moment. Until it happens, there is no way to even guess how you would respond. It was such a complete surprise for me, that before he told me the diagnosis, I was a little perturbed with the doctor for running an hour late for my post-op visit, and asked him if we could hurry through the exam because I had to leave in 15 minutes to see patients.
It seems everyone I speak to about this either had breast cancer or is close to someone who does or did. Since that diagnosis, I realize that I am now a member of that Reluctant Sisterhood. Before it happened, we probably would not have chosen this path. Yet I can’t help wonder how many others would accept to walk it again, to become absorbed into this collective conscious and unconscious network of healing.
This is not limited to breast cancer, nor to women; anyone with a need for healing is embraced by this light. No one has to be alone in their pain; there are so many who care and will reach out to offer comfort. So if you ache on any level, don’t hide it – once you open your heart, the way to heal will appear. There is a difference between bitching and laying open your pain to accept love. Although it feels good, the former is isolating if it ends there. Taken to the next level, the latter is uniting, and involves a lot of supported, worthwhile effort to do whatever it takes to heal.
The health field is my life work because I want to help others, so I felt I was quite the little Mother Theresa to begin with. This has been a humbling event; I thought my vision was so great as I explored the jungle of physical and spiritual health with a penlight - then suddenly there were floodlights everywhere. I feel blessed with a depth of compassion and empathy that would never have been so amplified had I not been faced with this detour in my journey through life.
Whenever I’ve worked with a coach or intuitive, I’ve been cautioned not to get too stuck in my head with all the intellectual stuff – and to deepen the connection with my heart and intuition.
There was probably a simpler way to work that out besides getting cancer, but here I am, so I intend to glean every possible lesson. My heart and soul are as sensitive as a sunburn to even the slightest touch of the love and kindness you send, all that is yet to be discovered, and the exquisite beauty of the world around me.
Disneyland can’t compare.